Head or heart? My Montenegro property dilemma.

The dilemma – head or heart?

But the thing is I have a dream of a life in the sun spent writing and simple living.  Until I can get there full time, I want to move my life towards it however I can.  I figure, life is too short to delay everything until some perfect moment in time.

I’m also a frustrated interior designer inside and every time I stay at my apartment, my heart is pounding with the ideas I have for it. Pictures are rattling around my head. Large modern artwork on white walls, stylish modern mid-century lights hanging from the 3m high ceilings. A sleek modern shower and gleaming new bathroom tiles that make the heart flutter.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve scrawled down designs for each room in a flurry of inspiration, writing lists on my phone of changes I would like to make, storage problems I would like to address, plans I want to carry out.

Head knows that renting it out makes the most of the asset. Makes it work when I am not there. Brings in some money. Fulfils my drive to optimise every aspect of my life.

But the idea of refurbing it for myself and bringing over some belongings and making it a bolthole for my own use, a second home to escape to, my simple place in the sun…. Now that tugs at my heart strings.

Follow head or heart? It has been a continuous battle. Maybe you have some of these of your own.

The middle ground person would interrupt at this point and say well, can’t you have both? And I have asked myself this question too. Optimisation. Walk the middle ground and do both. Refurb and rent out. Leave some things out there but lock them away and rent it out also. Sorted.

Or is it? Why hasn’t it been that simple?

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams.  Live the life you’ve imagined.

Henry David Thoreau

Head or heart battles feel complicated

Maybe one of the reasons for my dilemma is that renting out does bring a certain amount of stress. I have high standards and I struggle to meet the standards of how I would ideally manage it, if I was on the doorstep doing it myself – rather than 1500 miles away in another country.

Money is also a consideration of course.  But the rental income, is not such a large amount that I absolutely can’t manage without it.  There are extra costs incurred when the place is rented (things get damaged and worn out), which would not arise if it was just for my private use.  So, costs would be less.  The general cost of running a home in Montenegro are very low, anyway.  And I am fortunate enough to be able to run the apartment without needing to rent it out.

But the main thing is that I am not really a person of the middle ground underneath it all. I want to throw myself into something in life. I don’t want a ‘middle ground’ life if I’m honest. The background rule book in my head says it is the sensible and right thing to aim for. But when I am brutally honest with myself, I have to admit that I want to pursue a life that makes my heart sing. I want to be radical deep down in the things that matter to me.  The things that make me want to get up in the morning and make me feel, well, me.

Moving closer to my dreams

So, I have decided to be bold and accept this about myself rather than trying to ‘make the most’ of the property. I’m going to stop striving for this perfectly orchestrated scenario where I have both optimised the asset, whilst also balanced neatly with my long-held dreams.

I have decided to go radical and follow my heart. Do it up into the lovely apartment that my inner designer envisions so clearly, take my shampoo, notepad and books out to leave there and make it the Montenegrin bolt hole I so long for. My place in the sun.  My simple life by the sea.

Maybe you are in a similar tug of the war inside – the classic head or heart situation. Where there seems no perfect solution and you just keep going round and round. I encourage you to be honest with yourself, and who you are. Not how you think you should be.

Knowing what is important in life

​None of life is pure heart without the consideration of head – like, money and all the regular logistical stuff. Of course, we all need to balance practicalities with our dreams in life. But I suppose we all need to sift through what is most important to us and decide our direction in life. That often involves hard decisions, because the bottom line is, we can’t have it all.

As for me. I’ve happy with my decision to follow my heart. I’ve come to peace about the way forward and that is worth much more to me than trying to strive for it all.

We only get one life and I don’t want to silence my heart every time in the name of optimisation and being sensible.

I wish the same clarity and peace of mind for you too.